because of you i write in here

jthmsquee @ 2008-02-23T17:00:00

2008-02-23T22:29:59Z

can march please come quickly because i plan on going to ormond beach and staying at dads house for the weekend until sunday afternoon or so. i just need a break from everything and wnat to go back home right now.

jthmsquee @ 2008-01-07T19:17:00

2008-01-08T00:20:56Z

i dread mondays now
im at school from 8am up until 250pm and then go to work from 3-6
this is not gonna be fun

and i am officially broke beyond belief. i saw my checking account balance this morning and nearly had the big one.
and i wont get money until the 15th when we get payed again.
how am i gonna do this.
im taking everything at this moment for money cause i dont care.
its going to be a crazy week right now.
this money situation has to clear up very soon or else big problem and i mean big.

jthmsquee @ 2007-11-05T22:32:00

2007-11-06T04:27:09Z

he's amazing, thats all i gotta say =]
dinners, movies, the concert, he really is a sweetheart <33
i want my cuddle buddy, i miss him and i want him. now dangit

jthmsquee @ 2007-09-24T10:45:00

2007-09-24T14:57:22Z

im sorry i cant speak to you like someone else but im not her. i dont just speak my mind when i need to. unfortunately i just keep it in until im ready to speak about whatever needs to be spoken. i wrote you that letter for a reason. it explained what i wanted to say and what i wanted to get off my mind.
you can think what you want about me. its fine. ill stay my own distance.
talk shit if you want, maybe i deserve it in your mind.
but for now, ill keep to myself and leave you guys alone.
i just cant be a part of this group right now.

jthmsquee @ 2007-07-27T00:57:00

2007-07-27T05:02:19Z

2 more days and he comes home!
i can not wait. im soo excited now ever since i found out! i just keep smiling alot and thinking about everything he said. good lord ive missed him. and especially with our past we've had, oy!! but man i cant believe he's coming home on sunday! yes!!! and i already told him he's all mine when we hang. im not sharing with anyone, i dont care. so we'll see what he says when he reads that one lol.
*dances in chair*
i just keep smiling over it. i love it!! and he knows that i love it! why did i ever let him go, why? who knows but i wouldnt be surprised if i or well we in this case got that question answered and figured out cause its been bothering me for a long long time. and seeing as how we both tend to think alike about stuff, im sure he's thinking the same thing to. so many questions and so many answers im sure. oh to have to wait until then to get them answered and just hug him like crazy for being away for soo long and not being able to talk to him like before.
just 2 more days, just keep reminding yourself that. only 2 more days!

jthmsquee @ 2007-07-17T10:23:00

2007-07-17T14:31:41Z

so this is the way it is going to look starting august 20 as far as classes go....

Mondays
8-915 general biology
930-1045 introduction to oceanography
1230-145 introduction to healthy living (does not start until sep. 10)
5-615 math for liberal arts 1
630-820 general biology lab

Tuesdays
430-620 introduction to oceanography lab

Wednesdays
8-915 general biology
930-1045 introduction to oceanography
1230-145 introduction to healthy living (does not start until sep. 10)
5-615 math for liberal arts 1
630-820 general biology lab

Thursdays
no classes

Fridays
no classes

jthmsquee @ 2007-06-02T02:32:00

2007-06-02T06:34:39Z

im slightly getting sober and im cold
not cool man

and becca you actually thought i would read that entry to let everyone know about the concert details. douchemonkey. i just read it now for the first time, silly ne-tash-a

i want my blankey!

jthmsquee @ 2007-05-22T08:39:00

2007-05-22T13:08:04Z

i've come to the conclusion that i miss having that someone. i think it was after seeing nick for a couple of weekends and just thinking about how we used to go out and whatnot and then not seeing each other and me ending it; i just miss it.

and ill finally admit it, i miss john. even after he screwed me over royally.

it would be nice to find another guy who will be there for me, listen to me, and take me out every once in awhile.

i've realized that i dont like being alone. i love having someone there. i like when i have someone to sleep with and wake up to the next morning. im a cuddler what do you expect lol.

a part of me wants to have nick back and the other part doesnt. im just wondering when the hell will i find that one right guy.

love sucks
it just does.

i hope i find a guy soon cause that would be nice, seriously.

jthmsquee @ 2007-04-11T20:46:00

2007-04-12T00:53:40Z

im sitting in front of this computer waiting for a test to load that i have to take for work and of course its taking forever. and im also waiting for this guy to get to my house so i can give him the notes for his girlfriend who is in my radio class. but of course he just called and was like oh im sorry, my phone died and i had to turn all the way around as soon as i got to pine island and taft to go back home and charge it for a bit. ill call you back in a little bit to get directions to your house. i was just like oh ok thats fine. but really im annoyed and was like damnit! i was hoping he was calling to say im here where do i go know. whatever. myspace bulletins are being gay and not loading properly.

oh thank god the a.c. turned off. it was way too cold for me.

thank goodness pay day is coming up. i need money so badly. i gotta pay mom. and i also have to do some stuff myself. and thank god the semester is coming to an end. i want to go away sooo badly!!!!! i really want to see my house up north and be able to see daddy. and maybe see nana and papa if they can come down.
and then of course work my butt off all summer so i can make boo-koo bucks and pay my bills and save some on the side lines.
i hope more of the pages for the work test has loaded. damnit!! the a.c. is back on. grrrr!!

jthmsquee @ 2007-04-09T11:18:00

2007-04-09T15:22:15Z

anyone wanna help me clean my room and bathroom so it looks pretty and respectable??

im already getting unfocused and wanna just do whatever.

i really need to get back to cleaning. lets see how long i can last this time.

jthmsquee @ 2007-02-09T09:19:00

2007-02-09T14:22:50Z

so apparently anna nicole smith died. and right here in our own neighborhood at the hard rock hotel and casino.
kinda weird seeing as how i go there to gamble sometimes.

that place is going to be crazy insane now between people trying to gamble, and then the news channels trying to cover their stories and then people coming to the casino/hotel just to see where anna nicole smith died.

oh lord *shakes head*

i just feel sorry for the baby cause now her mother is gone and she wont be able to ever get to know her.

such a sad thing. but at least you know she's going to be with daniel now

jthmsquee @ 2007-01-03T10:25:00

2007-01-03T15:30:47Z

ok were good to go now.

took the first one. just have to take the last one later tonight while im at work.

hopefully the emitrol will help and i wont feel sick like told. but who knows.

but so far so good

so for now, i'm just gonna relax and stay at home and watch a movie or two until i gotta get ready for work.

jthmsquee @ 2006-12-21T00:59:00

2006-12-21T06:10:30Z

its thursday so only one more day and then its my birthday and i'll be off to the casino to go have fun with my friends and to get my new tattoo. i'm ready for it, this tattoo will def. make me a bit more happier then normal. i think it'll bring that peace and comfort i need.
i dont care what everyone else says so if you dont like it then oh well.

ok i thought i had more to say but apparently i dont.

jthmsquee @ 2006-12-19T17:11:00

2006-12-19T22:22:44Z

ok i've come to the conclusion
1. i need singing in my life. i cant stand not being able to sing and such

2. i miss david and want to see him instead of having to wait till friday when he comes to my party. such a dork but thats why i like him.

3. i'll never be able to speak my mind to my mother like i want. she just judges me and treats me like a 5 year old.

4. i'm never going to get off of curfew. i'll be stuck on curfew till the day i die and my mother will make sure of that.

5. my mother will always see me as a child and never let me experience life outside the house. i'm living in a bubble basically. god forbid i mess up and learn a lesson from it. no, i must stay inside the house and not know what its like to be 19, 20 in 3 days and experience going to clubs and staying at friends houses over night just b/c i chose to stay there at the last minute.

i dont want this life anymore. i want my real life i should have.

jthmsquee @ 2006-12-18T14:59:00

2006-12-18T20:09:46Z

ok so yeah its been quite awhile since i've been on this thing and updated.

oh boy where do i start. i have no clue

school is over thankfully. i passed sociology with a C (thank you jesus), theatre and speech class i got B's (yay!) and then english i failed but i saw that one coming. everyone in that class was going to fail.

friday is my birthday so i'm going to the hardrock with friends and then going to a hotel afterwards that i rented and just partying it up. im probably gonna get a tattoo as my bday gift to myself. im thinking of having the words hold on put on my wrist with a star on either side of them. but i want the words in old english/gothic type font. all in black.

i'm still stuck at publix unfortunately, but i'm hoping that after the christmas season i can possibly apply at becca's place that she works at, but only if they are hiring.

re-did my room. new paint, changed the furniture positions.

ok im not making a real update anymore seeing as how its 3:08 and i have work at 4, and i must leave at 3:25. great. guess i'll have to wait until i get home to continue this on.

too be continued...............

another chapter in my life has come to an end

2006-10-30T04:33:03Z

i just keep reminding myself that what i did was the right thing. i needed to. then again i needed to a long time ago like everyone said but i never listened until now.

unfortunately as much as i didnt want to i had no choice.

i broke it off with nick. yes i'm upset about this and i will be for some time i know that cause for the first time this really hurts. i know now the meaning of having your heart torn out and stomped on. i mean normally this happens when someone tells you its over but even though i told him i couldnt do this anymore, it still hurt alot. i really did like him. i gave alot of myself to him that i never had with anyone else. i've already cried my tears and will continue to cry for who knows. but i know that one day i am going to see the sun and there could possibly be someone standing there waiting for me.

i have nothing bad to say about nick. he was always a great guy. and i know he will be no matter what. i can only wish him luck and hope he finds someone that is great for him. as much as i wanted that to be me, it unfortunately didnt happen that way. but its ok, i know i will find someone for me one day.
like christina told me, what doesnt kill us makes us stronger, and this is just something i've learned from.

so it is with this i close the chapter on the book, and begin a new chapter in my life.

NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS IN 3-D

2006-10-22T20:33:26Z

I'M GOING TO SEE THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS IN 3-D TONIGHT WITH BECCA!!!
YES YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WERE HAVING A DATE. DINNER AND A MOVIE LOL
I KNOW YOUR JEALOUS NOW BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO SUCK IT UP AND GET OVER IT =]

I HAVE WAITED MONTHS FOR THIS EVER SINCE I FOUND OUT IT WAS COMING OUT. AND THEN FRIDAY IT WAS RELEASED AND NOW I GET TO SEE IT. YAY!!!
I'M GONNA BE SOOO DAMN GIDDY AND HAPPY WHEN WE GET TO THE THEATRE TONIGHT.

OH CRAP I GOTTA MAKE DINNER FOR MOM SINCE I'LL BE EATING OUT TONIGHT. SHIT
BETTER GO. BYE!!

yay!!

2006-10-20T19:04:49Z

NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS IN 3-D IS OUT TODAY!!!! YES YES YES!!!!!!!!
CANT YOU TELL I'M SUPER EXCITED ABOUT IT LOL.
AND THERE IS GONNA BE A SOUNDTRACK FOR IT AS WELL WITH THE ORIGINAL MUSIC ALONG WITH OTHER BANDS SINGING THE SONGS. SOME ARE OK AND OTHERS ARE'NT THAT BAD. BUT SINCE ITS PART OF THE MOVIE I'M GONNA GET IT.

jthmsquee @ 2006-10-16T14:32:00

2006-10-16T14:38:21Z

ok i've only had 3 hours of sleep. how the hell am i functioning right now. hell how did i get to school without crashing on the road. its a mystery to me. i still have to go to theatre class today at 12:30, but of course that means leave at 11:45 so a hour and 6 min. left to go. then i still have to go to the store and pick up brownie mix so i can bake brownies for my speech presentation tomorrow. yippee. and then of course paint again so i can hurry up and finish this damn project so i can sleep in my room and not have to deal with the couch or the dog barking again and people moving around the place and causing me to wake up. thank god i dont have work today or else i'd be very sleepy and unaware of whats going on.

jthmsquee @ 2006-09-29T23:58:00

2006-09-30T04:02:34Z

i now will have kick ass music thanks to becca! i bought a xm radio tonight from target. i cant wait till i get it all set up and have it working. i'm all excited and becca was like i'm all excited for you just because your excited about getting it lol.
we get so sidetracked easily. we get the movies but dont even watch them.

jthmsquee @ 2006-09-26T21:35:00

2006-09-27T01:45:06Z

ok so i'm watching tv and i was flipping through the channels and came across larry king live and its about anna nicole's son's death. this is a sad thing to me in my opinion. i mean what parent wants to lose their kid, no one does. and her attorney revealed that baby girl's name is Dannie-Lynn Hope. and the father is howard k. stern. her attorney and best friend. its not larry birkheads like the tabloids reported. they even planned on getting married. but b/c of daniels death howard said its on hold for the time. they need to get through this especially since they havent had time to greave.
i think he's a good guy.

jthmsquee @ 2006-09-26T18:12:00

2006-09-26T22:16:42Z

the new evanescence album is kick ass. i've been listening to it all day. or at least while i've been at home. i cant wait till it comes out next week; i'll be at the store buying it. i'm already trying to learn the songs.

jthmsquee @ 2006-09-21T20:34:00

2006-09-22T00:46:43Z

i'm cranky, tired, and feel like crap.
i went to blockbuster and rented the family stone, jarhead, and mean girls. hopefully there good.
i got called today while i was in class to come into work tonight just for a few hours, but i never called back b/c there was no way i was gonna work tonight on my day off. i'm sorry but i'm not working when i feel like crap, am tired and just want to relax for the next two days. whatever, they can get annoyed with me all they want. if they ask i'll say oh i was working on a project for one of my classes and my phone was in the no answering allowed zone. its a bunch of crap but do you think i give a shit. hell no. its freaking publix.
i'm gonna go watch the rest of csi:miami now and then go watch the movies.

jthmsquee @ 2006-09-12T22:13:00

2006-09-13T02:14:25Z

ok i just saw some commercial for a movie called jesus camp.
i seriously just said aloud what the fuck.

jthmsquee @ 2006-09-06T10:29:00

2006-09-06T14:40:25Z

its crazy at my house now. yesterday our handy man came and tore down our front fence so that a new one can be put up finally. so as of right now the front of our house is open to everyone and they can see our ugly jungley yard. buts that ok cause were gonna get rid of all that stuff again and mom is going to put lots of flowers in there and make it look very pretty. but both me and mom said we liked the whole no fence thing in the front. its nice pulling up to the parking lot and seeing our place. not the usual brown shit colored fence. so thats going on, and then we had new light fixtures put in which are really nice in my opinion cause i def. have to agree with mom, they go with the furniture that she had gotten months ago. nothing matched in this house when we moved in. and then fiona's room is finally gonna get fixed cause of all the damage.

friday is the party so i'm looking forward to that. and if you havent heard about it now you have. my mom is going out of town so party at my place. let me know if your gonna come.

but thats about it for now. i have theatre class later on today so gonna have to leave in about an hour. but for now i'm just gonna sit here and do basically nothing.